Not an epilogue, but a hint

How do you feel when you dance? In some dance styles, I feel the pleasure of being with other dancers. In others, I am vessel for the music - finishing as a breath, a rag or at the music's grace, an illuminated being. Those things for many years drove me and satisfied me as a dancer. I was never driven by accessories or dazzling costumes. The few pieces I own are much adored and worn to death. The spectre of being someone mysterious is fun of course. But during my 20s, and then increasingly in my 30s, I am getting a taste for a new feeling in dance. A feeling that is about being enlarged, transformed. No longer am I trying to fit prisms of 'beauty' from a world I do not belong in. I am interested in that feeling of disappearing when you dance. Disappearing. Transforming into breath. Into flesh and bones and wondrous spirit. Surprising myself! Spilling over with joy, ridiculousness, awe, ache. Attempting the impossible. Over time this will mean that some changes need to be made. I will need to take away some of the things that I like. Some things that are precious to me. Just so that I can make room for the things that I love.